a raw collection of words from my heart

22.12.16

here's a piece of my heart | part i.

image from tumblr

7.15am again, and I am sitting precariously on the rusty chair of this forlorn coffee shop.


You are sitting across the table and every fibre in my body is straining to keep my eyes on the steam wistfully pooling around the cup's rim. Because I can't swim and your eyes are too deep for me to stay afloat.


I crack a joke and cringe as it falls flat, but you must know that humour is my self defence because you laugh and ask if everything's going on alright.


And for that moment I almost lose myself. I want tell you everything I know. That you make me feel like the most beautiful person when I'm around you. That the stars shine the brightest in your eyes when you laugh. That π is a perfect name for your dog. That even though I teach formulas for a living, I'll never begin to solve the puzzle of how I fell for the lonely man in the coffee shop.


But I don't, because you are grinning again and I know my story is a sad one, one that would stain your smile and hang heavily on your heart.


So I sit there and laugh like I'm fine as we joke over simpler things that matter less and gaze at the town as it slowly wakens through the frosted windows. And for that moment I can pretend that all is well with the world.



[ at 8.00am I leave ]

//

HELLO MY DEAREST PEOPLE. I'm so sorry for dropping off the face of this planet but college has been incredible (but crazy, incredible crazy, crazily incredible, heh) so I haven't been around this space forever. I've missed this but it takes awhile to start my writing engine again. I'm thinking of having a part 2 (!!) so hang around for it alright!! Hope your holidays have been going on beautifully; I know mine has ♥ I"VE MISSED THIS SO MUCH AKSAJDSJDKLSJDA it's good to be back (for however long, it's still good.)

22 comments

  1. LIS I WAS LITERALLY THINKING ABOUT YOU TODAY AND I WAS LIKE I REALLY MISS YOU AND I WANT YOU TO COME BACK AND HERE YOU ARE AND HERE I AM SCREAMING AND FALLING OFF MY BED BECAUSE I AM SO FULL OF JOY OH MY GOODNESS. God is so good. what what what.

    also. this. i know i know i know. AND IF YOU DO A PART 2, I WILL DIE. so do it. because being raw is always a good thing. loves loves.

    x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. CALLY I"M CRYING I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH??? i need to catchup with all the good stuff i missed so don't be alarmed when you see random page views on your super old posts alright huhuhu (sorry not sorry).

      God is so, so good. I love you to the moon & back. xx

      Delete
  2. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh. I MISSED. YOUR FACE. AND YOUR WORDS. AND EVERYTHING.

    i'll come back when i've stopped crying. <3
    God is so good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. EEEEEEEEEK MY DEAREST ADDY <3

      Let me know when you're back; I'll pummel you with virtual hugs. Ugh, I've missed you. xx

      Delete
  3. other than the fact that I am now dead, I loved this.
    No, but that isn't a full enough word for this. Thisthisthisjhflksdjflkd. YOU ARE A QUEEN OF WORDS HOW. I MISSED YOU SO MUCH. I'LL PAY YOU FOR A PART TWO TBH. luv u.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. U R BAE, LIV <3

      You are so full of love and I'm just so overwhelmed. MUCH ADORES FOR YOU. xx

      (p.s. can you pay me back with your perfect blog posts because that's the only currency i accept)

      Delete
  4. yup i'm officially not able to handle the loveliness of this.
    THIS IS AMAZING. I've missed you writing so much, wow. You blow me away with your words, and I'm not kidding. AND A PART 2 OF THIS SOUNDS LIKE ACTUAL BLISS SO.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. YOU are too lovely for words autumn i'm too blown away by your comment rn ajdslkdjs <3
      I've missed this lovely community too darling xx

      Delete
  5. OH MY GOSH ELISABETH I HAVE MISSED YOU SO MUCH OH MY GOSHHHHHHHH <3<3<3<3<3<3 I'M JUST SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW WOW.

    Also, this is literally my new favorite thing on the planet. I'll chip in to Olivia's Pay Elisabeth For Part 2 fund. BECAUSE THIS IS PERFECT AND I NEED MORE. <3 xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. !!!!!!! you make my heart so happy grace !!!!!!!
      & YALL. Too kind, & too beautiful <3 so much love for you xx

      Delete
  6. WHOA.
    YOUR WORDS ARE SO BEAUTIFUL, I NEED MORE!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I"M FLOORED you are too kind darling!!! xx

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  7. This is perfection and gives me the feels sooo bad!
    This needs to be in a book or something! <3<3<3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *HEAPS MORE FEELS ON YOU*
      that means the world to me clara, thank you xx

      Delete
  8. This was SO good.
    welcome back <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. eeeeeeeek, thanks love, it's good to be back xx

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  9. Im so emotionally and I just read this and now Im actually crying??? real tears are streaming down my cheeks. your writing is so beautiful. I cant take it.

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    1. FAITH that means heaps to me, thanks so much love.
      i'll brb with more tissues i think i ran out crying over your beautiful comment <3 xx

      Delete
  10. Well isn't this the most beautiful thing of the internet today

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    Replies
    1. oh elissa you're the sweetest <3 thank you dear!! xx

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  11. Oh this hurt my little heart but in a beautiful good way <3

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    Replies
    1. eeeek ouchie it hurt my heart writing it too (huehue) but i'm glad you like it <3 xx

      Delete

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