a raw collection of words from my heart

25.11.13

it's his birthday


dear darling,

i don't think you quite comprehend how adorable and precious you are to us. you're the first brother we've ever had, and you have been a gobstopasmashing one. i never know what to expect around you; your frank toothy smile with who-knows-what smears around the chin, and your obsession with all things noisy and truck-y. it's almost like living in a extended amusement park with you around. although you have been countless labelled as spoiled by your loving (and awesome) older sisters, you know that you will always have a little special place in our hearts, doncha? you've been kissed, coddled, cuddled, squeezed, pinched, and hugged countless times by us. mom says that you are so blessed because we dote on you too much. but then again, you're growing up, and i'm sure there will be one day you look down at us (from your lofty height) and say, "can you not coddle me in public anymore? i'm getting too old." and my heart will break, but i'll still cuddle you (albeit not in public) because you'll always be little brother.

and when that day comes for you to set off into the world, and taste firsthand what a evil, cruel, and depressing world it is, i'll tell you to see that beauty beneath the ugliness. that if you look closely, you'll see the traces of glorious beauty streaming forth, a reflection of the Creator's radiance.

i can't believe you're already five. it might seem lightyears away from teen-hood and adulthood, but you'll be there someday too soon. and i'm going to treasure every single moment i have with the sweetest, best hair-flicking bro i ever have.

happy birthday, luke.
little sunshine boy.


time's flying too fast || 


{and i'm leaving you with some enthusiastic flag-waving and patriotism from the boy himself}

23.11.13

this post is dedicated to The Doctor in honor of the 50th anniversary of Doctor Who which is to be released sometime over this weekend, so go grab something blue to hold on to in honor of the amazing Tardis.

{you're welcome (because you thanked me for reminding you, right? yes you did)}

-please be prepared for a high level of fangirling which is typically very abnormal for me-

all the eleven doctors









YESYESYESYESYESYESYES
...please?








I thought... well, I started to think you were just a madman with a box.
Amy Pond, there's something you better understand about me, 'cause it's important and one day your life may depend on it. I am definitely a madman with a box.

and just in case you don't know who the doctors are, these dudes are the ninth, tenth, and eleventh doctors.
i'm been pretty crazy with the doctor who series recently.
ohmygoodness just look at them.


perks of travelling with the doctor:

1. the tendency to talk about the most random things, like bananas of course, in front of an army of cyber things who could kill you any moment
2. exaggerated facial expressions
3. exaggerated voice intonations
4. exaggerated everything
5. AND THE FEZ. THE FEZ. (enough said)
6. and also so many feels. so, so many.

THE 50TH ANNIVERSARY DOCTOR WHO SPECIAL IS COMING OUT ON SUNDAY.
oh guys, when i found that it was to be also screened on the bbc channel here in singapore, i was like shrieking and screaming. and my family, who still retained a some sanity (how do they even do that??), was naturally very shaken by my demonstration and thought me nuts. but anyways.

bow ties are cool || 

19.11.13

and it's mid-november

all photos || via some cool place on tumblr

and hallo, it's already mid-november with a month (only a month!) to the busiest time of the year, Christmas. i don't really know how i've been doing. last week, at the conference, i saw so many people i've missed for the past few years and it was exciting to see what they had been up to and how God was at work in their lives. but when they ask me how i've been doing, i put on a great big smile (that is probably too huge to be genuine and would make the cheshire cat proud) and say i'm doing great. wonderful. fabulous. gobstopasmashing. which isn't totally true of course, but one doesn't expect a torrent of little picky problems to come tumbling out when asked "how have you been."

i don't really know how to answer them anyways. at that moment, i feel alright. ready and brave to conquer fresh problems. but within the next hour, i'm wallowing in a hole of depression and self-pity, which i know is not healthy. mood swings that others tell me it's normal to have at this age. but i don't like this normal. can't normal be joyful and peaceful? i've just been really tired maybe. too tired from focusing too much on the little things in life and missing out on the big picture God has for me. there are so many distractions, so, so many for a teenage girl living in a society that simply parades distractions. and i just have to keep reminding myself: when tired, rest. rest in the peace only He can give.


(anyways, i was just thinking the other day how nice it would be to go travelling for a few months some vague time in the future. see the world that God's created. just thinking about it makes me happy. oh! and in addition, i saw that jocee is having a giveaway of really cool stuff so go on, check her out. you won't be disappointed. {this is a sort of anticlimactic/rambly end to the entire thoughtful ambiance of this post. well, deal with it; that's just my personality ha. and yes, i've missed this dear little place to share my thoughts and with you all. glad to be back after a month of hectic busyness!})